Flying in to Tampa

A jumbo jet is just coming into the Tampa Airport on its final
approach. The pilot comes on the intercom, "This is your
Captain. We're on our final descent into Tampa. I want to thank
you for flying with us today and I hope you enjoy your stay
in Tampa Bay".

He forgets to switch off the intercom. Now the whole plane can
hear his conversation from the cockpit. The copilot says to
the pilot, "Well, skipper, watcha gonna do in Tampa?"

"Well," says the skipper, "first I'm gonna check into the hotel
and take a big crap.... then I'm gonna take that new stewardess
with the huge tits out for dinner..... then I'm gonna wine
and dine her, take her back to my room and put it to her big
time all
night."

Everyone on the plane hears this and immediately begins looking
up and down the aisle trying to get a look at the new
stewardess.

Meanwhile the new stewardess is at the very back of the plane.
She's so embarrassed that she starts to run to try and get to
the cockpit to turn the intercom off. Halfway down the aisle,
she trips over an old lady's bag and down she goes.

The old lady leans over and says: "No need to hurry, dear.
He's gotta take a shit first.

This Joke was sent to me by my late girlfriend's Mom, she now works as a missionary to orphans in Tanzania. Incredible how she maintains her sense of humor.

She cooks....





Helps with surgery assisting Dr. Sam who I met last year when he was getting some help from some of the Boston Area hospitals.

Gail and Sam delivering shoes to one of the Orphanages.

Gail in traditional Tanzanian Garb with 2 of her Angels

Gail is over 60 years old...She'll probably whack me for saying that..but her love for these children knows no limits and I am proud of her and all she is doing to spread her loving spirit .

We'll be having a party to support Gail's efforts in Gloucester, Massachusetts on Sunday, March 18th..If you live in the area or are interested in what Gail is doing in Tanzania you can email me at:
glosta161-at-gmail-DOT-com

You'll want to change the "-at-" to "@" and the " -DOT-" to " ."

Voting, Losing and The C Word,- No not THAT one

The voting continues and I am sure that by Monday we will have a good idea which of the "Issues" I've presented in my Poll are considered to be the "Biggest Problem Facing The World" Now I know I haven't put all the issues up there, but believe me, we will get to the bottom of it..Monday's post will point us in the right direction..

My BIGGEST problem now is that I failed to win the Mega Million Jackpot tonight, again !!

My Losing Ticket !!

They aren't my real numbers, I'm too superstitious to post them. Of course now these numbers will probably come out next time!! If YOU use them and win...remember where you got them !!

Final thought of the moment.... I Watched a great documentary today called "TheCorporation" It was a Sundance Film Festival Winner in 2003 so I guess I'm a bit late seeing it; however , for those who haven't you can download it free at Bit Torrent

What's In Your Milk??

So Far Global Warming is Ahead...

I'm hoping for more voting on my last Post. It seems that people are only allowed to vote once from their computer, which is good if you are the only one that uses it. I'll try another polling widget in the future, however, the map that Blogflux uses with their poll is kinda cool and I wouldn't want the same visitors making multiple votes...

I am surprised that slave trading, yes it still happens, hasn't registered even one vote.

Also, while the Anna Nicole choice was a bit of comedy, I do believe the world faces an increasing number of people who feed off Tabloid News..I do believe they represent a growing problem. If you haven't voted yet...PLEASE DO, as of 9AM Thursday, March 1st..there have only been 15 votes..VOTE today!!

If You Are here Vote on The Poll, I Value Opinions

As there have been at least 75 visitors lurking about in the last 2 days, I ask you tpo please take the poll below...it's just a click! If your here via Blogmad, Blog Soldiers or Blog Explosion then you are here for AT LEAST 20 seconds and it only takes a second to vote...

For Monday, For the Readers and the Lurkers

It's Monday, I just watched the video showing the demolition of the cofferdam in China today....,

Picture courtesy Tour Round China.com

If you want to see the video it's right here ! What is a cofferdam you ask ??

Wikipedia says:

"A cofferdam is an enclosure beneath the water constructed to allow water to be displaced by air for the purpose of creating a dry work environment. Commonly used for oil rig construction and repair, bridge and dam work, the cofferdam is usually a welded steel structure that is temporary, typically dismantled after work is completed." In this case they blew the sucker up!

Last Wednesday in my Fart and Stuff Post I said If anyone had some new words I'd use them in a post and give them all the credit. Well, a promise is a promise and Milly Moo , a blogger from Adelaide, Australia supplied the words..to understand what I'm talking about...well you would need to read the Farts and Stuff Post

Of course Milly Moo will know already and on her blog Blurb From The Burbs , her newest post is about words that make her Wince...Don't just Lurk go Have a Look!!

"Just as I got comfortable toejoeing on the couch watching my favorite Sci Fi Channel show, my sister Me' , who was laid out on the recliner, began phlegm-phlamming without a care. I felt like giving her a swift karate kick in the head just to stop that annoying sound but I figured I'd just end up parping. Let me tell you parping can be very embarrassing when your trying to do a Bruce Lee . Of course it's not as bad as wib-wobbing, now that is just disgusting"

Thanks for the words Milly-Moo, love the comment and my offer still stands..Anyone that leaves me a new word..I'll try to write a post next Monday with your words and a shout out to your Blog or Website..

Comments Welcome!!

Dennis Johnson R.I.P.

Dennis Johnson was one of sport's classy guys. He was a joy too watch..

DJ Workin some Magic on Magic 1986

"I hate to lose," he once said. "I accept it when it comes, but I still hate it. That's the way I am."


On a lighter note, If you ever thought about watching the TV show Friday Night Lights, see what Ben has to say in his Gasbag Review first, you'll be glad you did.

Flying Without His Cape and An Idea Generator

I wasn't really sure what to write today, everything kinda got started on the wrong foot. I was lying in bed when I got a call that my Dad had fallen. I jumped up, dressed quickly and ran out the door. He and Ma only live a few houses down. I found Dad in the house sitting at the bottom of the stairway in his PJ's and looking angry with himself. I told him he can't fly down the stairs without his cape....

We checked him out as best we could and then got him up and into the car...We spent a couple hours there getting Xrays and evaluated. He's gonna be sore but I think Superman will be Okay..Just better not piss off my mom cause he can't move too fast right now.

Since then I've cooked Grilled Cheese Sandwiches for Mom and Dad, Hamburgers for 4, and couple varieties of cookies for anyone that can get there hands on them. During this time I've also consumed a couple of rum concoctions, I needed them.

So it's come to this, reporting the minutiae of my day. While this may make an interesting read from time to time, I think I may have found a couple Web sites that can help generate those creative juices....At Plot-O-Matic they remind us that we've all seen movies or TV shows and said to ourselves "I could have written that" and Plot-O-Matic helps you do Just that:

Here's my "B" Movie Plot Outline:

The Hideaway
an original screenplay concept
By Tom

Science Fiction: A struggling artist teams up with a well built female cyborg to save the earth from aliens. In the process they rescue a super intelligent chimpanzee. By the end of the movie they beat up 73 bad guys and end up winning the admiration of their world , living happily ever after.


Think Waterworld meets Buckaroo Banzai

Now I just have to get this idea out to some producers, next it's Hollywood.

Farts and Stuff/ Words on Wednesday

Last night we played a game of Trivial Pursuits with the Parental Units....One of the units was in the kitchen pouring some tea and let loose with a fart......A loud One..Now this was unusual as this Unit was not the one we normally see farting across the room with every step...attempting that quick get away and tooting like a train leaving the station.

This is where we stood at the edge of discovery. I suggested that our beloved unit in the kitchen had not really farted . I blamed the Unit sitting at the table. I maintained the "Table Unit" had become such a "Prolific Farter" or you might say "Fartolific" that he had refined his craft and become A "Fartriloquist" the ability to project his farts in order to shift the blame on someone else....

Oh, we laughed and we thought for a bit that a new word had been discovered.

But alas, today I found it in the Urban Dictionary:

The art of projecting one's gaseous emission so that it seems to come from another source, as from a pet dog, grandmother or goldfish.

Bob's quite a fartriloquist, he'd rather die than admit being responsible for stinking out the place.

Maybe they will give us credit for a secondary definition....

For a golden moment we believed we were part of the Etymology of the English language..however, and more importantly, we shared a truly funny family moment and a good belly laugh to boot..what came later is for another day...but I'll tell you this much.

We're never gonna let Anne Marie forget it....!!

I found another great source of "New Words" at Word Mint and the first word they had listed was :

Gassassination

Meaning: What the guy sitting next to you, does to you, when he farts. Usually not fatal, although it is known to knock a few unconscious.

Pronunciation: Gassa-see-nay-shun

Usage: With the recent spotlight on the use of various torture techniques by interrogators at Guantanamo Bay, authorities are seriously looking at gassasination techniques. Interrogators are being encouraged to eat exotic food.
Root: Gas +assassination

Have you got any New Words out there...if so use them when you comment and I'll put them in next Wednesday's post and give you all the credit!!